The Magic Horn Treatment

- by Amanda Brooks Baker

On my way back from the athletic club this afternoon, I was making my way across 86th Street driving west. I was in search of some food to pick up on the way to my spa appointment. I only like to eat healthy food after a vigorous work out, so I chose to stop at one of those wraps stores that have opened up all over the town recently. They cater to "Trixie In Training" level girls who just moved into the Village and haven't a thing to cook in their small kitchens. Most of the ladies of my caliber usually cook in our large, expansive kitchens, and only take out when we're on the run, and can truly benefit from it.

Anyway, as I was turning left onto Westfield at 86th Street, this guy in a big nasty beater car runs me off the road! Thinking quickly, I jammed my hand onto the Jetta's horn, and took off after him.

I believe strongly in the horn treatment, which is carried out by staying on the butt of someone who does something stupid to you on the street, and laying on the horn for at least one minute, if not longer. At about 30 to 40 seconds, the offender starts to get extraordinarily pissed, which serves them right for messing with you.

Just make sure not to give the horn treatment when there is a cop around, because he might mess with you for causing a public nuisance, even though the real nuisance is the idiot who you were honking at in the first place.

If a cop hassles you, give him the Sweetheart Treatment (which, for the benefit of you younger Trixies, is exactly opposite from the Magic Box treatment) and he will let you go without any problem (unless he is a she ... in which case this usually results in a ticket).

That's all for this week's Jetta Column.

Good luck this week navigating your way around our lovely Village!

The Trixie Table - by Rory Fitzgregor

The Trixie Lifestyle often includes exquisite dining experiences and brushes with some spectacular wines. Our village and outlying Indianapolis neighborhoods are literally overflowing with options to feast on world-class cuisine, and chase it with some of the best-crafted wines, beers and spirits known to man.

I recently left my job as Senior Content Manager for a major consulting company to pursue the Le Cordon Bleu Culinary Arts Program at The Chefs Academy. I have always possessed a God-gifted palate, and I am so excited to share my extensive knowledge and experience with those of you who may not be so fortunate!

From time to time as my busy social schedule allows, I will review a new restaurant from the uniquely BRTS perspective and report my experiences back to you. Additionally, being a wine connoisseur, I will give you the low-down on the best wines for any occasion.

Bon Apetite & Cheers!
Rory

Latest Reviews:

Trixie Cellars 2006 Bin 404 Merlot
This is the second release of the limited Trixie Cellars Bin 404, the BRTS Foundation's signature wine from the "Sonoma Semester Sisters" program. All of the grapes for the 2006 vintage were grown in a single plot from 10 year old vines, and harvested by hand in September of 2006. Only 38 cases were produced and most was auctioned at the Trixie Stars ball in 2007. There may be a limited selection of the Bin 404 remaining at Kahn's Fine Wines (ask Jim) or at Fresh Market on College.

The Bin 404 derives its name from the epicenter of a Trixie's world, 404 Broad Ripple Avenue -- the triangular intersection just a few feet from the Vogue where Broad Ripple Ave, Westfield Blvd and College Ave intersect. The Bin 404 will not distract your palate with overly complex characteristics. This wine can be enjoyed on just about any occasion and with any cuisine. This particular tasting was accompanied by a chicken & avocado burrito (with everything + extra hot sauce) ordered as carry out from La Bamba and the Merlot in no way interfered with the flavor of the food.
I give this wine 3 out of 4 Trixie Stars. ***


La Bamba - Burritos As Big As Your Head

To coincide with the tasting of the Trixie Cellars Bin 404 Merlot, my fiancé, Brett, and I knew that we had to accompany the enjoyable wine with traditional Broad Ripple late night fare. So, a quick flip through my Rolodex before the drive home from work brought the venerable late night south of the border fare of La Bamba.

La Bamba is a sloppy, greasy Mexican gut-bomb shop right on the strip playing a traditional Mexican music blend of mariachi/hip-hop/fusion head pounding beats with a tile floor setting that is simply off the hook. But, this night, we needed the solitude of Brett's bungalow on Kingsley to concentrate on our first tasting. So, we popped by for a carry-out order after having waited in the bumper-to-bumper trudge down Keystone to our lovely village of tranquility.

The carry-out experience was really great. I got a good feel for the "flava" of the place from Rafael, the friendly kitchen guy who threw all our ingredients on the searing hot griddle as we waited. After a bit of a language barrier, we got our order shoved into the paper sack with plenty of little hot sauce cuplets.

Brett said the inside of the place reminded him of Tijuana, with all the cheesy, dated minimalist decoration and the thumping brass horn music. Brett got drunk in TJ once while visiting his frat brothers at San Diego State, so he would definitely know! He was so inspired by the authentic hippity-hoppity mariachi atmosphere that he poured a bit of his wine on the white tile floor to give props to his peeps. Rafael just laughed.
We give both atmosphere and service 3 1/2 out of 4 Trixie Stars. ***1/2

Peace!
Rory

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