The Man Who Did Not Belong

- by Amanda Brooks Baker

Today I was driving down Illinois near Westfield, on my way to get some coffee and then off to my spa appointment at Studio 2000 in the Circle Tower building downtown. As I approached the intersection, I noticed that my best friend Melissa was going the opposite way up Illinois.

Now let me tell you a little something about Melissa. She is my best friend in the world. We both moved to Broad Ripple after graduating college. Melissa loves to drive her boyfriend's Range Rover all around the village for hours. Typically she will drive the Kessler-College-86th Street-Westfield rectangle, with little stops here and there when she notices a nice boutique or a Starbucks.

I quickly honked the horn of my Jetta, and waved at Melissa. But when I stopped the car for just one second or two to ask Melissa if she and her boyfriend Jake were ever going to get married, this irate man in a big truck, who was just behind my Jetta, started to honk. Now, let me tell you, this guy did NOT look like he should be in Broad Ripple, much less honk at me for any reason! I turned my head around quickly and gave him a dirty glance and then proceeded to tell Melissa that I'd see her soon at Midtown Grill or somewhere, and that I hoped she had a nice afternoon out in the Village.

Unfortunately, the peace and serenity didn't last more than another three seconds before that idiot in the truck behind me started leaning on the horn again. He must have held it solid for 25 or 30 seconds. How annoying was that?!? I really started to get pissed, and turned around and gave him another dirty glance. The light had changed to red while I was talking to Melissa, so what right did he have to honk at me now? We had missed the green light anyway so we would all have to wait patiently for another few minutes.

Well, you get the story. The moral of this week's JETTA is this: Ladies, don't put up with any crap from people in Broad Ripple who don't look like they belong. How can you tell if they don't belong? Just run down my handy checklist:

1. They aren't your boyfriend/fiancé/husband, or any of his friends or associates.
2. They aren't related to you, or they are not friends of your family.
3. They aren't an identifiable friend of yours or anyone from your work.

The only exception to this rule, in my book, is if someone looks important enough that you would perhaps like to make their acquaintance at a social event.

Good luck this week navigating your way around our lovely Village!